Unrequited Love
by unicorn-skydancer08
Summary: Terence loves Lucy, but is deeply hurt and humiliated when he finally works up the nerve to tell her and she turns him down.
1. Part 1

**UNREQUITED LOVE**

_I meant to make this a one-shot, then I figured I'd break it into two parts, possibly three. I've been feeling a lot of emotion lately, and I find writing to be great therapy. It's been mentioned in previous stories that Terence once held hope for Lucy, so I thought I'd write something that shows just that. Read and review, but don't bother if you're just gonna flame me. I know my stories aren't the absolute greatest, and I won't force you against your will to read them.  
_

* * *

**Characters (excluding Terence) © C.S. Lewis and Disney/Walden Media**

**Terence and Story © unicorn-skydancer08**

_**All rights reserved. **_

* * *

**PART 1**

They said that one was very fortunate to discover love; very rarely did one chance upon love twice. So it was with Terence, the tall, handsome boy with the shimmering white hair and beard, who was, in truth, a unicorn turned human.

He had encountered many women in his time, some fairer than others. As a unicorn, he was always intrigued by human girls, and he'd courted a few mares here and there. But it wasn't until he became human himself that he truly understood what real, honest love meant. Rhiella, a young human princess, was the one who unknowingly captured his heart. She was beautiful inside as well as out, and Terence loved her as he imagined no man ever loved a woman; such love rivaled the love Adam of olden time held for his beloved Eve. Yet, as it often happens, fate turned against them, and Terence now found himself alone in the world with an empty heart.

Whether his and Rhiella's paths would cross again in the future was anybody's guess; all Terence knew for certain was that his life would never be the same again, nor would he ever love another girl again, at least not in the same way.

Even in the mystical realm of Narnia, where he had genuine friends and felt at least some sense of belonging, he had eyes for nobody…save one.

Lucy, the youngest queen of the Four Monarchs of Narnia—there was something about her that caught Terence's interest, though he couldn't say what it was, or why.

She was so much like Rhiella, with her charm and wit, her childlike innocence, and it didn't hurt that she was quite attractive as well, with her slim, willowy figure, her mane of red-gold hair, and her sweet brown eyes. Terence remembered when she was just a child; but now, like a bud that ripens into a flower, she had grown and flourished into a lovely, mature young woman. Terence had always loved and cared for her with the warmth of an older brother (and a much, much older brother at that, considering he had well over a hundred years of seniority over her), but these days, he found himself looking at the girl in a different way. Though he initially tried to resist what he was feeling, he couldn't help it; every time he met with Lucy, he found his resistance melting, little by little, like thawing snow in the spring, until he couldn't deny it any longer. He loved Lucy—not with the same passion as Rhiella, but loved her all the same. He dared not tell her or any other living soul what he truly felt for her, but a tiny spark of hope had begun to take flame: hope that he might have found love again, that Lucy was the one to fill in that empty space, to put the pieces of his heart back together.

But did Lucy feel the same way for him?

Oh, there was no doubt that she cared very much about him, that she considered him a wonderful friend…but did she love him enough to return _his_ love? Terence longed to find out, but he was afraid at the same time.

He was afraid—deathly afraid—of losing her, or having her laugh in his face or think him crazy.

He'd already had his heart broken once with Rhiella; he doubted he could endure having it shattered again.

One day, Terence came out onto the Cair's private grounds to find Lucy already there.

She didn't seem aware of him, or of anyone else at the time, for she was moving about in a dreamy, fairy-like dance, though there was no music playing, at least that Terence could hear. She seemed to be dancing to her own music, letting her heart and spirit take flight. Her long, sleek dress floated about her ankles in fanciful swirls; her silver tiara glittered like a wreath of stars, and her hair, which had been left loose, billowed in abundant crimson waves.

How lovely she was, Terence marveled to himself as he watched her. Although her beauty did not quite equal Rhiella's beauty, she still emanated a radiance of her very own.

Once again, those overwhelming emotions that Terence struggled to keep in check threatened to rage out of his control. Ah, if only Lucy _knew_, if only she could see for herself just how much Terence loved her, how much he wanted her.

_Well, what are you waiting for? _a voice from within seemed to say. _Lucy is right there; now is as good a time as any to tell her. You haven't got forever, you know. Just say it and have done with it. _

_But what if she doesn't love me back? _Terence protested silently. _What if she turns me down? I don't think I could bear it. _

_It'd be worse to remain in ignorance like this, _the voice countered.

Terence had to admit that was true. Not knowing at all was indeed worse, and yet at the same time, it served as a protective shield. In the end, Terence found himself walking toward Lucy.

When at last the girl opened her eyes and saw him, she was so startled that she jumped back and inadvertently stumbled on the hem of her dress. She would have fallen had Terence not rushed up and caught her in his strong arms just in time.

"Whoa—careful," he cautioned her as he upheld her.

"Sorry," said Lucy, immediately feeling herself blush furiously. "I can be such a clumsy fool at times."

"And yet you dance so divinely," he gently teased. He smiled down at her, his bright blue eyes twinkling like the sapphires they resembled, and she had to smile back. Using Terence as her support, Lucy regained her footing and straightened her posture. When Terence was sure she could stand on her own two feet, he released his hold on her. His countenance sobered as he now asked, "But, really, are you all right?"

"Yes, I'm all right," said Lucy. She flashed him a grateful look. "Thanks, Terence. What would I ever do without you?"

It made Terence's heart flutter slightly to hear her say that.

"May I ask what you're doing out here, Lucy?" he questioned at length as he absently pushed back his long white bangs from his eyes. Naturally, they just came spilling right back down.

"Oh, it was just such a lovely day, and I couldn't very well bring myself to stay in the castle." She sent back the question. "What are _you _doing here?"

"Looking for you," he answered simply.

"Oh? What have I done?"

"Nothing," he never hesitated to reassure her. "Nothing at all. I only wanted to see you, what you were up to, if you were all right."

The young man paused momentarily, giving his lower lip a small nibble, then somehow found the nerve to say, "Actually, Lucy, there's something I have to tell you."

"Certainly," Lucy replied graciously. "What is it?" She folded her arms in front of her and centered her gaze on him, giving him her full, undivided attention.

Terence didn't say it right away, but lifted a hand to massage the back of his neck, as he often did when he was uneasy. "It's…it's…" He sighed. "It's hard to say, really."

"Come on," Lucy gently encouraged him. "Whatever it is, you can tell me."

The white-haired youth continued to rub his neck a minute or so longer, and dragged his hand all the way up over his face. When he finally dropped his hand altogether, he said, "I've been meaning to tell you this for some time, Lucy."

"What? Tell me, Terence."

In his heart, Terence offered a brief, silent prayer for strength. Lucy could sense his nervousness, and she reached out her own hand and laid it sympathetically against his shoulder.

Her light touch was what gave Terence the courage to loosen his tongue.

"I hope you don't think me stupid or foolish, Lucy…but…" He sucked in a long, deep breath, and finally those three strange and wonderful words came spilling out of his mouth: "I love you."

"What?" Lucy blinked, unsure of whether she'd heard right.

"I love you," Terence repeated, and somehow the words were a little easier to say the second time. "I wouldn't have believed it possible, Lucy…but I swear on my life that it's true." As Lucy stood there, staring at him in astonishment and disbelief, Terence went on, "You're such a sweet, extraordinary girl. You have the best heart of anyone I've met in Narnia, and you were always there for me when I needed you. Now, I want to be there for you." It took nearly everything he had in him to give voice to all this, but once he said it, he felt extraordinarily relieved, as if a massive weight had been lifted off his heart, while at the same time he felt incredibly idiotic.

A part of him was glad that he'd gotten it out at long last, while another part of him ejaculated, _What in the Almighty's name am I doing? _

Stunned, at a loss for words, Lucy could only stand where she was. Her hand slipped from Terence's shoulder and fell to rest at her side, and there she remained, as silent and frozen as a block of ice. Terence knew he'd caught the young queen off guard with his unpremeditated confession, but he expected her to brighten up and exclaim that she loved him too, or at least say _something_.

But nothing happened.

At one point, Terence dared to touch Lucy's face, cradling her cheek in his palm. Her skin felt soft and pleasantly warm beneath his fingers. Lucy did not shy away from his touch, but she still wouldn't speak.

"Please don't think any ill of me for this," Terence told her softly, his lucent blue eyes beseeching her. "I could never hurt you, Lucy, for all the world. I have no wish to harm you, or make you afraid or uncomfortable. All I want is to be with you, to take care of you. I know we're two different people, in essentially every aspect…but I love you and want you nonetheless."

Then, almost without realizing it, his lips were on hers, and he found himself actually kissing her.

It was a very light and mild kiss, but a kiss all the same.

The feel of their lips together made Terence keenly aware of just how long it had been since he was engaged in something like this. He felt his bowels fill to overflowing with sweet, aching longing, such as he had never felt since his time with Rhiella. Just as it had been with the other girl, the line separating fantasy from reality dissolved, and he began to kiss Lucy more heartily.

But then, quite abruptly, Lucy pushed him away, breaking off the kiss altogether and shattering the magic of the moment.

That was when Terence felt reality strike, with the force of an iron-clad punch. Seeing the look Lucy wore on her face, he feared to ask, "Lucy? What's wrong?"

"Terence…" Lucy faltered, her voice muted with disbelief, confusion, bewilderment, and a number of other emotions Terence couldn't quite pick out. "Terence…you…I…we can't…we mustn't…"

Terence felt his spirits sink, like a stone dropped into water, and he felt his heart start to crumble.

"Why not?" he protested, taking a step back from her, feeling suddenly very small. "You mean to say you don't love me? That you don't feel the same way I do?"

When Lucy had regained sufficient use of her tongue, she said, "Oh, I feel the same way, all right."

She hesitated for a time before saying in a faint, almost inaudible whisper, "But not for you, Terence."

Now it was Terence's turn to stand motionless, looking and feeling as though someone had just struck him hard across the face.

He couldn't believe what Lucy was telling him—that she was already in love with someone else. The young man could not bear to ask, but the question somehow found its way off his tongue: "Who, then?"

"Tumnus," was all Lucy said.

_Tumnus. _The image of the young faun, Terence's best and truest friend in Narnia, came to mind.

Tumnus was also very close-knit with Lucy—the two of them were the best of friends long before Terence came around—but Terence had no idea, would never have imagined that the girl's feelings for the faun went beyond friendship.

"Does he know? Does Tumnus know that you…that you…?"

"Yes."

Now Terence was feeling genuinely sick. His insides literally burned with humiliation and shame, and he bowed his head, unable to bring himself to look Lucy in the eye anymore. His lips tingled, and he now sincerely wished he had never kissed her in the first place. "I'm sorry," he said in a low, somewhat croaky voice as his eyes filled to the brim, as emotion closed his throat and his heart broke into pieces. "I…I didn't know."

Turning away from the girl, he murmured penitently, "Forgive me, Lucy. What happened just now…I promise it won't ever happen again."

To this, Lucy said nothing, so Terence just very slowly made way for the castle, feeling suddenly and inexpressibly weary, never saying another word, never once looking back.

When Terence got back to the Cair, Tumnus met up with him. "Hey, Terence!" Tumnus greeted his mate cheerfully, smiling brightly at him.

But Terence did not smile back, nor did he acknowledge the faun in any way. He only turned his face the other direction and kept going.

This caused Tumnus's smile to vanish at once. "Terence?" he called out worriedly. "Terence? Terence, wait—come back! Terence!"

Terence did not answer, nor did he stop.

Somehow, the white-haired youth managed to keep it together as he wove his way through the corridors of the Cair, at least until he reached his own room. There, after closing the door behind him, and twisting the key in the lock for good measure, that was when he lost it. Everything came down on him with full force, the oppressive weight nearly crushing him. A flood of tears broke out onto his face, and Terence bent his head and covered his face with his hands.

_No, _was the only logical thought amid his swirling mind. _No…no…no…_

He just couldn't believe it—couldn't believe it happened a second time. It was as though he had been stabbed, as though he had just lost Rhiella all over again.

It wasn't as bad as he'd feared it would be with Lucy; it was worse.

He had kissed Lucy, told her in the plainest way possible that he loved her, and she rejected him. He had given her his heart, only to have it destroyed anew.

Terence sank his face further into his palms, weeping harder. Was there any pain as great as this? Could fate really be so cruel?

Oh, that he had never told Lucy, never opened his mouth to begin with, then perhaps he could have gone on as before.

But now it was too late.

The cup had been spilled. The long-hidden secret was out. What was done was done.

Taking his hands away, though barely able to see due to the relentless stream of tears, Terence dragged himself across the room to his bed, where he collapsed onto the giant feather mattress. He groped for one of the pillows and pressed his face into its cool, soft depths. There he remained, for what must have been hours, sobbing out his grief, remorse, and humiliation, unable to contain himself, unable to stop.

**_TO BE CONTINUED..._**


	2. Part 2

**UNREQUITED LOVE**

_Well, here it is, part 2. I intended to end it here, but after giving it some thought, I decided it could do with at least one more chapter. You know the drill, guys: reviews welcome, flames forbidden.  
_

**

* * *

Characters (excluding Terence) © C.S. Lewis and Disney/Walden Media**

**Terence and Story © unicorn-skydancer08**

_**All rights reserved. **_

**

* * *

PART 2**

In the week that followed, Terence made sure to stay well clear of Lucy. He never touched her or made a move for her again, nor did he speak to her directly. He did look briefly at her now and again, but she was always facing a different direction when his eyes rested on her. Once or twice, Terence was sure Lucy was looking at him, but he knew he must be mistaken; for when he turned to her, she had already turned away. Moreover, she never spoke to him, acknowledged his presence, wrote him letters, or contacted him in any way whatsoever.

Terence knew the girl was upset with him, and he knew he deserved it, too. He had brought this on himself. He had made a complete fool of himself.

The young man also kept a considerable distance from Tumnus. He couldn't bear to face the faun again, after what he'd just done. Though not a word was spoken of it around the Cair, surely Lucy must have told Tumnus everything that had happened by now. Terence felt his face burn hotly at the thought, and a horrible, sick feeling twisted his gut.

It was bad enough that he had kissed Lucy, and that she had rejected him, but if Tumnus knew all this—Terence could very well die of the disgrace.

Aside from his intense embarrassment, and acute heartbreak, Terence also felt a full measure of guilt for making love to another girl.

Even though Rhiella had long since disappeared from his life, he still felt like he had betrayed her.

Though she wasn't anywhere within miles of Narnia, and could never have known what came about with Lucy, in his heart, Terence pleaded desperately, _Forgive me, Rhiella. Forgive me. _

As the days passed, as the week dragged on, Terence's once bright, youthful eyes grew increasingly duller. The young man never smiled anymore, or made his usual jokes, and he very seldom talked with anyone. His appetite decreased dramatically; sometimes he refused to come for a meal at all. He spent a great deal of his time shut up in his room, where he could be alone. At night, he wept openly into the long, lonely hours, but made sure to keep his face covered with his pillow the whole time so that the rest of the castle wouldn't hear him.

Finally, one day, Terence was walking alone through one of the vast corridors of the Cair, when presently he met up with Lucy, face-to-face. The two gave quite a start at the sight of one another, and they both stood frozen on the spot. Terence felt his heart quicken as his eyes interlocked with Lucy's at long last. Lucy could tell from the sight of Terence that the young man had not been faring too well. His face was considerably pale, and he had dark smudges under his eyes, whose lively spark had been all but extinguished. Terence thought Lucy looked as beautiful as ever, save for the look of distress that clouded her lovely brown eyes. He felt an involuntarily shiver ripple along his spine, and he had to clench his hands into firm fists to keep them from trembling.

For a long time, neither one spoke a word to the other.

Then, just as Terence was about to open his mouth to apologize yet again to Lucy for his misconduct with her, Lucy blurted out miserably, "Aren't you _ever_ going to forgive me, Terence?"

Taken aback at this unexpected plea, Terence knitted his brows at her and queried, "For what?"

"You know very well what!" Lucy's eyes were wet and diamond-bright with unshed tears. "Oh, Terence, I just can't stand us not being friends!"

Terence couldn't understand what the girl was getting at.

Why was _she_ apologizing to _him?_ She was not the one in the wrong. He was the one who'd affronted her in the first place; he was the one who ought to be asking for forgiveness. "I'm sorry, Terence," said Lucy remorsefully, misinterpreting his stunned silence. "I'm sorry that I hurt you the way I did. I never meant to, honestly I didn't. Oh, Terence, forgive me—please!"

That was when Terence found his tongue again.

"No, it was my fault," he contradicted, feeling his own throat constrict. "I shouldn't have been so impulsive. I shouldn't have sprung it all up on you like that."

"I should have told you the truth about Tumnus and me sooner. I shouldn't have pushed you away when you told me that you loved me and kissed me."

"That kiss should never have even come about to begin with, Lucy." Terence shook his head woefully. "I betrayed your trust in me, and took advantage of you."

"You offered me something very special, and I went and threw it back in your face. I just let you walk away from me, without even saying a word. I wanted so much to stop you, to tell you I never meant it the way it sounded, but for some reason I couldn't move, let alone speak. I was so sure you hated me, after I turned you away. Then, when you wouldn't talk to me, or even look at me…" Lucy trailed off, unable to continue. One of her tears that shimmered in her eyes spilled over her lid and onto her face, making a glittering trail down her cheek.

Terence was both surprised and heartsick; he didn't know, hadn't even realized.

"I thought it was _you_ who refused to look at _me_," he said softly. "I thought _you_ hated _me_."

Lucy brushed away another tear that had begun to fall, and managed a halfhearted smile. "I guess we were both too caught up in our own guilt to even notice one another, weren't we?" she said. "I guess we both jumped to the same conclusion. We just naturally assumed that we hated each other."

"So, you don't hate me?" said Terence, feeling his heavy heart lift somewhat.

"So long as you don't hate _me_," the girl countered. This made them both laugh just a little, and then they quickly sobered again. "Will you forgive me, Terence?" Lucy entreated.

Terence nodded humbly. "If you will forgive me."

He opened his arms to her, and Lucy made a prompt beeline into them. They embraced warmly, letting their forgiveness show in the embrace. Terence closed his eyes as he held Lucy close, and sighed. The tremendous weight he had borne throughout the week seemed to fall from his shoulders. While a part of Terence was yet hurt and disappointed that Lucy didn't love him the way she loved Tumnus, he was glad and deeply relieved that their relationship was not completely tarnished, that she cared about him enough to want to remain his friend.

But there was something else that yet troubled the young man. Loosening his grip on Lucy, he protested, "But, what of Tumnus?"

Lucy smiled, somewhat lopsidedly. "Actually," she said, "Tumnus doesn't know anything about this, as far as I can tell."

Terence stared at her in great surprise. "You mean, you haven't told him?"

She shook her head. "I never did."

Terence couldn't believe it. All this time, and Tumnus didn't even have a clue of what was going on? "Why didn't you, Lucy?"

"Because I know he's your dearest friend in Narnia…and I didn't want him to be angry with you."

"So," said Terence in a hushed voice, "you kept this whole thing a secret…to protect me?"

"And to protect him, too." Laying her hand on Terence's chest, Lucy added gently, "Also, I didn't want you to go around thinking that kiss of yours didn't mean anything to me. Because it did."

Touched, Terence felt a grateful smile spread slowly over his face, like butter on a hot slice of bread.

"Oh, Lucy," he breathed. "Oh, thank you…thank you, so much."

The smile that Lucy now offered him in return was one hundred percent genuine. "So, what do you say?" she kindly suggested, her hand still against his heart. "Friends?"

Terence didn't hesitate to pull the girl back into his arms, and envelop her in another tender hug. "The very best," he assured her.

**_- To Be Continued -_**


	3. Part 3

**UNREQUITED LOVE**

_Presenting the third and final chapter. It's much shorter than the previous two chapters have been, and the ending turned out kinda weak, but then, I suppose it could have turned out worse, too.  
_

**

* * *

Characters (excluding Terence) © C.S. Lewis and Disney/Walden Media**

**Terence and Story © unicorn-skydancer08**

_**All rights reserved. **_

**

* * *

PART 3  
**

Now that Terence was reconciled with Lucy, the young man knew he had to find Tumnus and make up with him, too. He only hoped and prayed Tumnus could forgive him for snubbing him the way he did. So, after Terence and Lucy had gone their separate ways, feeling a world of better about one another, the silver-haired youth proceeded to comb the castle for the faun.

Fortunately, it didn't take long at all to find Tumnus, who, as it quickly became apparent, had been searching earnestly for _him_. "Tumnus," said Terence, as soon as he saw him.

"Hello, Terence," said Tumnus quietly. "Long time, no see."

Terence felt a twinge of guilt when he heard that last part. Raking his fingers nervously through his already disheveled white hair, the boy began, "Listen, mate, I can explain—"

"You don't have to," Tumnus cut him off. "I know why you've been avoiding me this past week, Terence."

Terence stared at his hoofed companion. "You…do?" he was almost afraid to ask.

"I found out today, just now. I heard you talking with Lucy, and I learned everything there was to know concerning your peculiar behavior."

With a sinking feeling, Terence realized Tumnus must have been listening from around the corner, the whole time he and Lucy were together. That meant he knew about Terence kissing Lucy, from the very beginning. Oh, what Terence wouldn't give right now to simply dissolve into thin air, on the spot. What must the faun think of him? Bowing his head in shame and grief, Terence could only bring himself to say, in a hoarse, emotion-filled whisper, "Oh, Tumnus…I am so sorry." Then he closed his eyes and abjectly hid his face in his hands.

He wanted to run far away from Tumnus, but he couldn't get his legs to move, and his feet seemed to be nailed to the floor. However, Tumnus, instead of rebuking Terence or striking the young man down, or even getting angry, only placed a light hand on his companion's shoulder and said in an unusually gentle voice, "Terence, why didn't you tell me this sooner?"

"I'm sorry, Tumnus," Terence said a second time, his voice muffled by his palms. "I'm such a terrible friend, the very worst friend in the world." Taking his hands away, and lifting his teary, remorseful gaze to the faun's, he besought him, "I'll understand if you can never forgive me. I'll understand if you want nothing more to do with me. Just, please…please don't hate me."

Tumnus felt his heart brim with pity for the poor boy. "I could_ never_ hate you, Terence," he said softly, making Terence come closer to him and wrapping him in a hug. "Never!"

"Believe me, Tumnus," Terence half-croaked, "I could never betray you. Had I known that you and Lucy were already involved with each other, I would never have done what I'd done."

"I understand, mate," said Tumnus empathetically, as he continued to hold Terence and fondle him like a child. "If anything, I owe you a bit of an apology myself. Both Lucy and I should have been more honest with you. We shouldn't have kept you in the dark as we did. Maybe if we didn't, this whole misunderstanding could have been avoided altogether." After a moment, Terence felt Tumnus ease his hold on him a little and lift his chin, so they were looking one another properly in the face. "Forgive me?" Tumnus asked him.

Terence didn't understand why Tumnus and Lucy felt they had to take share in the blame, why they almost always had to be the ones to initiate the apology.

But he decided to comply. "All right," he said, "you forgive me, and I'll forgive you."

Tumnus smiled. "All right, that sounds fair enough."

He hugged Terence a second time, and this time Terence readily squeezed the faun back.

_**- END -**_


End file.
